Pictures of

Vehicle

My grandparents just bought me a 2000 Jeep Cherokee Sport . 60,000 miles Excellent condition. HAPPY HAPPY.

Now if I could just find the dmv for that little laminated thingy ...( january )

Spirit

An insane impulse overcomes you - holiday joy? The spirit of Santa? Your medication is off or out? --- and you find yourself loving christmas more then your family. Who else could I be explaining but me?

Someone told me the other day that " I may have an excess amount of holiday spirit" . What BS ?? Just because I want to try to make Christmas perfect in every capacity , buy gifts for everyone, purchase and have the top of the line EVERYTHING for everyone? Plan out sketches on decorating the house from the basement to the 2nd floor and more detailed sketeches for the Dept.56 Dickens Village? Just because I plan the outside lighting and how it will work cords and design wise in Novemeber? Because I attend many christmas events in december and go shopping often. I question if I should always get more gifts, am I guilty simply because there are to many witnesses to atest?

I do not know if its a good thing or an illness. :) . The point is that christmas means a lot more to me because I have now known the feeling of loss. I treat each day like it is the last one for all or any of us. This way I have no regrets. Christmas has become something more meaningful and that everyone in the family comes together. Its just nice. A combination of reasons amount to my " over enjoying " of Christmas.

Enjoy life

Support

Its now apparent everyone is supporting the " LiveStrong " bands. Which I to support.

looking forward / facts ?

As I look forward past the recent changes in my life, I look towards the upcoming days off and holidays. My agenda is rapidly filling up and time has become this next month something I cant seem to find. Suddenly I find myself asking where the year went? I know its not over, and I will argue the best is yet to come. Though it feels so strange that 2004 is coming to an end. Alas, I wait to start looking back on this year and the year ahead which will be for New Years Eve/Day blog entry.

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It appears I might have found information that the Westport town hall nor the historical society new of untill my discovery. Last week I visited the Westport Historical Society learning more about my family for my Madman paper. Though I knew most of what I saw and read, it was good to see archives kept of my family. My Great Great Uncle and Great Great Grandfather had owned roughly 1/2 to 1 mile long strip of property on the Post Road in Westport, there house lay where Ed Mitchells is now. That family extended itself and my grandmother was born etc. Her father and mother both were involved in the war effort, Great Grandfather in the Navy and Great Grandmother working at a pilot goggle manufacturing factory in Westport. Then my Great grandfathers brother had created the Westport Emergency Radio Commmunication Service in 1942 making it the first radio system for air raid wardens and local guards alike to reach to the NYC and Westchester area to warn of aproaching air raid attacks. My great great aunt was a plane spotter who was the first woman to sign up for the task in Westport and rallyed many other women of the town to join.

Getting back to what it is I discovered. I found the sign in and out sheets of the factory of which my great grandmother worked and had along side the historian discovered a name on there that does not match "common fact". The name of the indivual did not work at the factory and only appeared signed in twice in two years.

Now no one is saying this man was ever a spy or anything. I wouldnt know either way. No one can ever prove he was. I found it rather interesting none the less. Bottom line: It could easily be nothing, but no one had any idea why the name was there or who exaclty the man was. He did how ever have a German last name. Which again, could mean NOTHING.

I will be including this in my final draft of my madman paper/report as a side note to my research.

F***'D up plans

Well I was banking on going to the party tonight . My grandparents had forgot to inform me of a family dinner at my country club tonight. How nice ?! :( . Well , sorry all but next time I will be certain to be there.

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After this short week of school, I plan to take time to re-asses the social situation and liekly continue my " life changing descion " as its been called. For me now, its the smartest idea. It will hopefully allow me to be more relaxed and joyfull as the holidays come upon us. I intend this christmas to be a big gift giving one , atleast from my end to all friends and family. :) :)

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Goal's of the week : Get all my college apps and essays in BEFORE vaca.

Pssh to a title !

It has occurred to me my reasoning for certain issues is irrational. My rather current objections to attending an event were foolish and unnecessary. My previous blog alludes to me wanting to enjoy life more. That is what I am going to do; I just have to create the mindset to do it. Objecting fun events is no way of creating that mindset. By taking each day as it comes it will allow me to relax more and hopefully focus on things that actually need my attention.

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I have been doing a lot of Christmas shopping online lately. Thank the lord for credit cards. Though I will be in major debt in January its ok. I enjoy seeing people happy and in the giving mood. Christmas to me really is the most wonderfull time of the year and emotionally and will ofcourse always be there for me at the end of each year.

Changes in "Life"

As for what I was calling today an “Important life decision", that reference is because it will change my way of thinking and maybe living. The people who I have had in mind no longer matter the same way. Of course I care for them and will remain friends, but no longer will I hope for anything more. Some of these people have become obvious to you the reader and I am more then certain you could name all 3 people .I will not provide names, not only is that a new policy of my blog but for it is pointless.

Girls are not as much a priority as they have been considered in the past. What happens, happens. I will see what plays out in the time ahead and go from there. There is nothing else I need to do. For now its time to take things only as they come. Maybe now I can relax a little, what a concept!?

One day at a time...

Migraine GO AWAY!

Migraine is gone.:). I had it for 36 hours or so. It wasnt much fun.

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I continue to write the book out. Its quality and length are improving rapidly as I have been in the mood to write this week.

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I also continue to work on my madman assignment, but as I dig further I find more and more and more out. Currently I am applying for military service records of my Great Grandfather who served in the Navy of WW2.

Here I go thinking again!

If I were to analyze each sentence said to me or to someone that has to deal with well she would never do this or he would likely do that , I would be up everynight till 2am. Its a matter of deciphering what is of any value. Its like war intel, most of its either to throw you off or is totally false. It makes most sense to take everything with a piece of suspcion and doubt.
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On another note I was speaking with Ross this afternoon and we were discussing the preference of myn of living or atleast trying to rekindle the past so frequently. I expressed to him that with in the past lies a great deal of security and maybe even purpose and direction. With the future , its obviously a gamble. We discussed the need for the security physical and hypothetical. Ross had said " I don't understand what needs to be secure. I live in Easton, a very, very safe town. I go to a school whose largest incident is a yearly fight between two students. I have no reason to not feel safe. If you wear seatbelts and don't ride in SUVs and lock your car doors (and your house doors) and buy a mac or a firewall then you should be perfectly safe from all credible threats in the short term."

Just think about that , see what comes to mind. I sure as hell see it as a very literal sense in what I was asking , but Ross does make some good points.

ending

A good ending to a OK day . Over all got some ideas in my head for Christmas.

WTF

Snow this early in the season???? Wow, I woke up thinking I slept through November. We got about a dusting here.

Christmas List

I am making out 2 Christmas lists .

1 list for me given by others
1 list for others given from me

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So far I have ZERO shopping done but not to fear, with 6 weeks till Christmas , I should be able to get it done. Gotta LOVE Christmas . I know I do. The most wonderfull time of the year.

Pre-Book

I am expecting to release a 15 page excerpt of my book in February. The book will be done and edited and ready for release by mid-April. Its format is undecided. At first it will likely be in PDF format. Later in time , when I have time it will get published.

Out of Options

I am entirely out of options. I no longer know what to do. It's likely that I will just have to go on till the end of this school year dealing but maybe there is another solution I don't see.

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I was thinking all day what it will be like to live on my own, have a job and live the day to day daily grind of life. What items I will need and what I want to have etc. I only need : Couch , TV , Desk , G5 MAC , a dog maybe . There are a few others but I cant remember the now.

How simple it might all become , one day .

Salt intake

This evening at the dinner table , my grandfather says that I am using to much salt on my food. I casually laugh and say that I have always been using a lot of salt.He yells about my health for 5 minutes then gives up as it is not getting through to me. Those of you who know me , you all know I salt almost every solid food I consume. Some say its sick, ok most . Some say I will die early , ok most. The point is I like it and thats all there is to it. My blood pressure is low to average and I am healthy.

MMMMMMMM Salt ...

Rules ...

I was informed by Mrs. Pries that the new rules will stay in effect for the duration of the school year. We are going to have an all senior meeting POSSIBLY during 24 minute break next week to talk about the new changes.

As for people not experiencing these problems yet I can only speak for what I have encountered and continue to each day. I was told to not sit on the benches in the halls and was moved to one bench near the snack machines today.
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Note that from what teachers tell me, Mr.Calbro was not aware of new rules put in place and is yet to share an opinion with anyone regarding them.

Senior privileges

Today I attempted to walk past security to go back to my backpack which was on a bench along side another student coming back from a trip to guidance during lunch which was my study. I was stopped by security as I have several times last week. I showed him my senior pass and yet I was still declined access to the rest of the school. After seeing the roadblock I was encountering, I stormed into the main office and walked into Mrs.Pries's office. I explained my problem and she said that Seniors are soon going to have to use passes again . My concern for student rights was obvious and she told me to sit down. She said Security is making changes to rules and that she has nothing to do with the changes. In my quick thinking I said that it seemed a little too convenient that these policies are being put in place just before the NEASC visit. She then said it had nothing to do with that, which I do believe though because she wants to extend these new rules for the rest of the year.

When I asked for a pass back, to pass by security with, she asked where I was headed. I politely said one of the benches in senior hall because my backpack was still there. She told me seniors are now now longer allowed in the hallways during study and especially on the benches. I then expressed the amount of resistance she will find due to these policies and that it was taking away senior privileges. Seemingly she didn’t care and carried on with her day. I walked away knowing I had a secret weapon on my side, Ross Nizlek , the peoples voice. Later in the afternoon via phone I briefed him of the problems and he concurred with my position.

I see some heavy opposition coming in the days ahead. What’s worse is NEASC is here so if there is tension, it may look bad. Let’s wait and see if more students complain, I imagine they will. Hopefully the rules will go away after NEASC is gone.

So you wanna be a sitcom writer ...

I have a huge desire to write a sitcom P.S. - For those of you who are a tad slow, "sitcom" stands for "situation comedy". I have all these ideas swarming in my mind for one.

Maybe that can be one of two of my backup careers. The other is a casino floor host.

Law Enforcement , Protective services is my first choice career and will stay that way.

2 years

2 years ago today my mother passed away.

Cynthia Lynn Caldwell: 10/21/59 - 11/05/02

:(

* Love you Mom *

Election comments

As this country prepares and braces for another four years of George W. Bush as our President, we must look to not the defeat of Kerry but the election of 2008 and more importantly to keep an eye on Bush. As we know, a lot can be done in 4 years. Imagine another four years of the same, if not worse decisions and plans.

We can not allow Bush to make the same mistakes and guide this country into the very wrong direction it is in. Issues such as the draft, I do not see being put into place for now. Of course we do have a “back-door” draft occurring now, forcing our soldiers into staying a year or longer, forcing them not to retire and stay the course in Iraq. I ask you, how wrong is that? Soldiers who have served there time, there 8 or so years are not allowed to go home to there families because Bush wants to play with his military? It’s like us when we played with toy soldiers but on a much larger scale.

Focusing more on today, we are going to have to dig in and endure these next four years. No one is saying they will be an easy four years, but it has to be done. Some have honestly suggested the urge to attend college in Canada because of this election result, but I do believe that is a bit drastic. Some feel less patriotic.. We must stay behind our country through to good and bad times. We must maintain a strong position against the war on terror and see this economy gain strength in the next four years. Remember what this country represents to all those who are not lucky enough to live in this country. Recall to yourselves when you feel down about this country that people die each and everyday for doing things we do daily.

May God see us through the rest of the war and may God bless America.

WIshes gone unfullfilled

My grandparents, though $well off$ , there are certain things they really want and havnt gotten . Knowing how my grandparents are, certain things in life they simply wont buy. So maybe I have to do it for them. In due time ofcourse , not now.


Someday I would like to buy my grandfather one thing he has always wanted , a 1957 Ford Thunderbird. .

Granted a Gov't salary which I plan to have. I do not need a large salary.

Though , this is all just ideas .

Sick

Sick , Bronchitis I have. I feel like death.
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Got health paper done. 1200 words.

Work ...

This weekend has been comprised of some serious lawn work , church , hw and family over.

Not much to say.

Ride along scheduled for Tuesday Evening.
EMT Class : CH 7 Airway Management

I am going to once I get this cold out of me , I am going to start running again. I want to get back into shape. I do pushups everyday now.